Ah, the teenage years.  Remember them?  I do. 

In fact, I’m happy to see high-waisted pants and fitted tops return to the style guide for girls (and am working on getting into better shape so I can wear them again!)  I also remember it being a time of so many “firsts” – first boyfriend, first time driving a car, first exam – and feeling like I was forever out of my comfort zone. 

During the teenage years we try on personalities like sweaters sampling friends, sports, foods, languages, clothes and so much more in an effort to find our perfect fit.  And even though the pre-fontal cortex – the executive centre of the brain that evaluates and rationalizes – is not fully developed until we’re about 23, our bodies look “adult”, so we’re expected to have it all figured out by the time we graduate secondary school.   

If you were a rebellious teen, you weren’t alone.  Stepping into yourself meant daring to shake the status quo to create yourself as an individual.  Of course your programming was nicely in place by the time you were about six so while you may have appeared to ignore your parents, they were your rocks, your grounding and your mentors. 

When I was a teen there were no cell phones (or voicemail, for that matter), many moms looked after the homestead first, and dads weren’t shy to tackle authorities if they threatened their family’s well-being.  

I had my share of embarrassments; wearing a dress to school for the first day of grade nine to witness absolutely everyone else in jeans and a t-shirt, forgetting my textbook for French class and the teacher asking in front of everyone if I forget my skates when I went to practice, tripping on the fringe of the red carpet skating up the podium and landing on my ass vs. the position of first place. The good news at the time was that nobody had cell phone cameras and without social media to exploit our blunders, or shame us beyond what we were already experiencing in our own minds, that stuff often fell away. 

Today’s teens struggle with seeing the lives of their “friends” (all 3000 of them) looking so much better than theirs!  Oh, the pressure to attempt to be a living mirror of the impossible.  

Aha!  ~ “Don’t be embarrassed of your current situation.  Half of these people are covering up the same situations with fake masks, filters, and smiles.” Nathan Francis, Teenage Self-Sabotage Coach 

Here’s the thing: you’ve only ever been you and you will only ever be you.  You have nothing else to compare you to …. except for everyone else on social media who seems to be doing better, having more fun and moving their personal needle forward.  Don’t fall for it.   

If you’re embarrassed or feeling like you’re falling short by comparison, think again.  Ther IS no comparison.  Self-doubt is real and we all feel it.  Setbacks are real and we all experience them.  Challenges are real and we all encounter them.  It’s how you choose to respond to them, arm yourself and get into action that makes you, you. 

I’ll give Nathan the last word: “Make a plan, stay disciplined, stay focused, and execute consistently.  You will make it.  You are Worthy. You are enough.”  

We are having an amazing time together in Human U delving into one chapter of 50 Simple Ways to Release the Shackles of Self-Sabotage each week.  It’s uncanny how similar we are when we allow ourselves to get real!  Join us here then hop on YouTube for more on this embarrassing subject. Find Nathan here www.teenageselfsabotage.com